Once Upon a Time

I went to the Kotel every week and it was one of the highlights of my life. With time, though, going there began to be routine and I didn’t want that special place to lose its magic for me. So, I thought long and hard about how I could recapture the enthusiasm I’d always had for the privilege of being able to pray at the site my ancestors had only dreamed about. HaShem sent a solution, a solution I didn’t like, a solution named Corona. 

The Kotel became off-limits for a long time. Even after it reopened going there has become a much different experience. The Kotel tunnels where I once loved praying are barred. The open plaza is now divided into cubicles surrounded by opaque plastic. Each stall bears a sign stating that the space is limited to twenty worshippers and all must wear a mask. Instead of viewing the other women there with love, as my partners in prayer, I tend to look at them with suspicion, wondering if they’ve been close to anyone sick with Covid19. 

 Recently I’d found myself a reasonably isolated spot for my prayers and then a teenage girl came into my space. As I moved my chair backwards, I noticed she had a mask, but it was only over her chin. Annoyed, I rebuked her, “At least put on your mask.” My directive was ignored and I moved even farther away. 

 Just a few minutes later one of the guards entered the area and I motioned to him that she wasn’t covering her face properly. Obviously, it was not an unusual occurrence for him. With patience he calmly said, “Tzadekah*, put your mask on.” She also ignored him and I mumbled, “Apparently she’s not such a righteous person.” 

 Later, I was appalled at my words. How could I have been so judgmental? If I look closely in the mirror, I will not see someone perfect but rather a fallible human being. I want to be judged favorably so I need to return the favor to others. 

Maybe that girl has a medical reason that excuses her from covering her mouth and nose. Maybe, as a teenager, she doesn’t think rules apply to her. Maybe she thought she had the mask on and was so absorbed in her prayers that she didn’t hear either me or the guard. Since I’m not acquainted with her I have no way of knowing. 

 Chanukah is the holiday in which we light up the heavy darkness of the long winter nights with candles commemorating the miracle HaShem made for us. Although our daily prayers contain a plea for the miracle of the rebuilding of the Holy Temple, on Chanukah these prayers take on a special poignancy. 

It is my belief that we all have the power to bring that miracle about by improving our behavior between ourselves and G-d AND between ourselves and others. That girl at the Kotel was wrong not to follow the rules but that doesn’t mean she’s an evil person. All the parenting books, and the Torah, teach us to condemn someone’s actions, not the person.

 If I can truly internalize this lesson, then I believe I will be doing my part of laying one of the cornerstones for the biggest miracle of all. Then I’ll be able to tell stories of once upon the time. Once upon a time the Kotel was the only remaining part of the Holy Temple. Once upon a time war and disease were part of daily life. Once upon a time people didn’t know how to get along with each other. May those “once upon a times” soon become our past!

 *righteous person

 

My novel, Growing With My Cousin, a good winter read, is available at Jewish bookstores and on line at https://mosaicapress.com/product/growing-with-my-cousin-a-tale-of-love-life-and-land/ or http://www.feldheim.com/growing-with-my-cousin.html or https://www.amazon.com/Growing-Cousin-Ester-Katz-Silvers/dp/194635113X/ or from my home.