Who doesn’t remember the first time they asked the Four
Questions? I certainly do. It was at my grandparents’ Seder in Oklahoma. For a
couple of minutes I was the star as I stumbled through the unfamiliar Hebrew
words. Being that I was always the only
child at their Seder my chance at stardom lasted quite a few years, up until my
grandfather was bedridden in an old age home. Then the venue of the Seder
changed to my home in Kansas and many of my mother’s side of the family joined
in. I was replaced and my younger cousins became the stars. If I remember correctly
I wasn’t jealous. I’d had my years of
glory and, anyway, the little ones were so cute.
In the first couple of years of my marriage my husband and I
hosted Seders without any children and we wondered who would ask the questions.
There was a simple solution. One of our guests was a recent convert, making her
the youngest Jew at the table. All of us found her recitation very meaningful.
When our children became old enough to do the asking that
added a whole new dimension to the Seder. It was when the grandchildren began
asking, however, that I was truly touched. As I watched them proudly recite the
questions in their native tongue I envisioned my father sitting next to me on
our couch and patiently teaching me what his parents had taught him.
Thankfully, my family was carrying on the train of tradition that began
centuries earlier.
Several years ago when my special needs grandson was
three-years-old it was his turn to ask the Four Questions. Although he knew
them well at home with just his mother or father we weren’t too sure that he’d
be able to handle the attention of aunts, uncles, cousins and grandparents
focusing only on him. There had been no need to worry, though. In a halting,
melodious voice he made us proud. As he
finished we passed around the box of tissues, wiped away our tears, and
congratulated him on a job well done.
All children are special whether they have specific needs,
talents, or problems. It is my prayer that all our children will find their
place full of love at their Seder table.
As I write these words I cannot stop thinking about Adiel
Kalman’s children. Adiel, h’yd, was murdered less than two weeks ago on his way home from work by an Arab
terrorist . His
four children have joined the hundreds of other orphans who’ve lost their
parents to hate. They are four more on a long list who will not have their
parent at the Seder to hear them recite the Four Questions. May they be the
last to suffer such a loss. May this be the year that Eliyahu truly announces
the coming of the Moshiach.
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