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Who would
have thought I’d need tissues for Grandparents’ Day at my third-grade
grandson’s school! Indeed, in the beginning there was nothing to cry about. He
greeted us with a hug. We saw his classroom. Then we stood in line to have our
picture taken for a magnet. All was nice, not very exciting, but pleasant. And
then the children were instructed to escort their grandparents to the
basketball court for the program.
Several
hundred plastic chairs had been set up for us. My grandson joined his friends
and schoolmates on the ground. The principal stood up and with his words I
began to realize that I’d made a mistake not packing any Kleenex.
When I
told my mother that we were having Grandparents’ Day there was silence on the
phone. Perhaps we’d lost reception. No, my mother was just searching for a
response. Finally she told me that if my school had had Grandparent’s Day when
I was young they wouldn’t have needed any chairs. There were just a handful of
grandparents alive and able to come.
It was true.
In the early days following the establishment of the State of Israel the vast
majority of Holocaust survivors had left their parents’ ashes behind in the
European cemetery the Nazis had made. Many of refugees from the Arab
countries did have parents but most were too old or infirm or working too hard to
even think going to a grandchild’s school program.
After the
principal spoke it was the school rabbi’s turn. He called eight special
students to the stage. They were special because each of them had moved to
Israel from France the past year. Every one of them read a few lines in Hebrew.
Some read smoothly with no trace of a French accent. Others stumbled with the
words and spoke as if they’d just stepped off the plane. It was the tallest
girl who touched my heartstrings.
Our grandparents
are not here with us but they are sending us hugs from France.
As she spoke
the tears leaked out of the corners of my eyes and flowed down the sides of my face.
For my children had also depended on long-distance, virtual hugs from their grandparents
in America.
I don’t
think I’ll ever forget my oldest daughter’s class Bat Mitzvah party. Every girl
was told she could invite four guests. My daughter cheerfully asked her parents
and two friends from Jerusalem to come. All was well until we entered the
building where the event was being held. As I saw grandparent after grandparent
I was overcome with emotion and had to make my way outside to shed a few tears
of self-pity.
That happened
twenty-five years ago. In the interim we raised our children without any
grandparents nearby. It wasn’t always easy but we were blessed to marry them
off and privileged to become grandparents ourselves.
The program ended
with the singing of the national anthem, The Hope. As I gazed at all the proud
grandparents surrounding me I remembered that for thousands of years living in
the Land of Israel was nothing more than a hope. Now, though, it is an
attainable reality. I am so proud and grateful to be able to build my own chain
of family tradition here in the land HaShem gave to the Jewish people. I pray
that all the Jews will find their way to come home, join us, and build their
multi-generations in The Promised Land. Then no grandchild will have to make do
with long-distance, virtual hugs.
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